discernment

“If we learn to open our hearts, anyone, including the people who drive us crazy, can be our teacher.” Every person you meet has something special to give you—that is, if you are open to receiving it. Each encounter offers you the gift of greater self-awareness by illustrating what you do and don’t accept about yourself. An honest look will show you that the reactions you have to others give you more information about yourself than about them. You can never know for sure what motivates other people. But you can learn what you are accepting or judging in yourself. For instance, if someone makes a remark about you and it’s something you also judge in yourself, it will most likely hurt. However if they make the same remark and you don’t have that judgment about yourself, it probably won’t bother you at all.Reactions always have to do with our own self-judgments and feelings of inadequacy or strength, not the other person. Most judgments of others are ego strategies to avoid uncomfortable feelings. However, if you lack the awareness of where they come from, they can lead to even more discomfort down the line. Discernment is awareness and understanding without an emotional response. Exercising discernment feels very different from getting your buttons pushed. Judgments that cause emotional reactions are clues to help you find personal insight.